What would happen if Serial Killers, and one Serial Hypnotiser made friends on Facebook?


Welcome to another installment of Serial Killer’s on Facebook. For those of you just joining us, what we have here is a social experiment. We wanted to see what would happen if we took the identities of serial killers and put them on a social network such as Facebook. Most of us have had our serial killers chosen for us by the “What Serial Killer Are You?” application on the Facebook site itself. But for those of us who couldn’t get into the application, or took the quiz and scored one of the other serial killers already in the group, they got to pick who they wanted to be. Lucky bastards! So let’s start with a roll call.

ROLL CALL!

Stacy – John Wayne Gasy. AKA Pogo The Clown.
Emily – Ted Bundy
Michelle – Ed Gein AKA Buffalo Bill
Chrisitna – Gary Ridgeway AKA The Green River Killer
Jeremy – Jeffrey Dahmer.
Ron – Charles Manson
Ryan – Mr. Herman Webster Mudgett. AKA Dr. Henry Howard Holmes
Larry – The Zodiac Killer
Jennifer – Countess Elizabeth Báthory de Ecsed

Jeffrey Dahmer – Hey gang. Great to be back. Sorry I’ve been out of the picture for so long. The New Year’s been good. My resolution was to get my name back out there. So I’ve been working on a reality show idea. It’s kind of a cross between “The Running Man,” “The First 48,” and “Man vs. Food.” So here’s the pitch: I travel around to different cities in the US. I offer $1,000 to a homeless dude if he can survive the next 48 hours. Then once I catch him (or will I? Suspense…), the second half of the episode serves as a cooking show as I highlight the local cuisine. If I’m in New Orleans? Bum Gumbo. St. Louis? Ribs. California? Who knows. But it’ll probably involve avocado and sprouts. Anyway, the stuffed suits at A&E tried to call the cops when I made my pitch. I’m on my way to MTV next. Next to “My Super Sweet 16” my show looks almost wholesome.

Dr. Henry Howard Holmes – That show has Emmy written all over it!

Gary Ridgeway – Ooooooooooooo I can’t wait!!!! It is gonna be awesome!!!!

John Wayne Gacy – MTV will TOTALLY take you! If you can get a teen pregnant that would just be the icing on the cake. Good luck Dahmer. I look forward to watching your show. Not only to see the way you make the Bum Gumbo, but also to learn the best way to escape from you just in case you run out of bum’s and decide to use one of your friends in an episode instead.

Charles Manson – Don’t they already have that show on Fox?

I hope you enjoyed our little conversation and found it educational as well. We have been doing research on ourselves as well as on each other so we know what buttons to push, how to compliment one another, and for basic knowledge. Until next time, sleep tight.

Love it? Hate it? Let me know! Send questions, comments, brownie recipes or random brainfarts to: mrsdiagnosed@yahoo.com

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